~Whom I Love Most~ BertholdtxLiaxJean Chapter1 SNK

~one year and four months from the end of Just Your Average Hero~

Hands so close to one another. Cheeks so near that they might press together. Legs intertwining as we move in synchronicity. A pant in my ear, a gasp from my lips, and sweat from the both of us. An arm brushes against a shoulder. Chests rising quickly and falling in the same manner. I'm tossed on the ground, and I drag a figure down with me, weight pressed heavily against my chest. I hear a grunt in my ear, and I moan. The weight is quickly removed, and a face hovers over mine, teasing me.

"Goddammit, Annie, that hurt," I whined, rubbing my stomach where she had kicked me.

"You aren't used to it by now?" she said dully, her pale gray-blue eyes laughing at me.

"Please. I knock you down as much as you throw me down," I fired back, grinning. "That's why we're fighting partners, because we can't seem to decide who's better. So we keep on fighting and advancing ourselves."

She shook her head at me, grinning slightly. "You're over thinking things. I fight because it pleases me. You fight because you can't decisively win, and it bothers you."

"Pfft. You make it sound like I have some sort of problem with losing," I said, rolling away from her and getting up.

"But you DO have a problem with losing. Either you do what you're doing now, which is refusing to give it up, or you cry and beg until you get your way."

"Haha! That's mean," I said. Then I caught a glance of something, and I inadvertently devised an entertaining plot. "But you know what would be really mean? Ambushing Bertholdt and Reiner and knocking them on their asses. I mean, just look at them, so interested in each other, fighting it out like nothing else in the world matters. It's so sweet it makes me sick. But there's one thing that they're forgetting: life is random and violent, and you never know when something unexpected is going to happen."

"That IS really mean," she said, frowning. "I can't decide who I should take."

"Reiner," I said immediately. "I love watching you take down the big guy. That face he makes when a girl takes him out? Priceless. I don't want to miss that."

Annie nodded. "Works for me. I, personally, like watching Bert freak out whenever you get close to him."

"I know!" I said, laughing. "It's like I have cooties or something."

"Or something," she said, her thin lips twitching into a smile.

"Please," I said, rolling my eyes. He acts like that around ALL girls. I'm no exception. He's got some serious issues when it comes to the ladies. Hormones," I added with a giggle.

"But you ARE the only girl he makes the effort to be around," Annie argued.

"You mean the only girl he doesn't run away from when she approaches? Yeah, I guess so. But that's because we've been friends for almost two years," I said lightly.

"Friends, hmm? Sure he thinks that way, too?" Annie asked.

"I don't know. I can't read minds," I said defensively. "I don't even understand my own thoughts half the time. Geez, you sound like those dumbasses who think Jean and I are in love."

"That's another topic I could argue with you all day about," she said, smirking. "But, to the matter at hand." She began to duck and dodge through the crowd, making her way towards Reiner.

Taking a slightly different approach, I contended with the couples practicing by simply walking around them and positioning myself behind Bertholdt, waiting for the show to begin. Sadly, this wasn't the first time we've randomly jumped unassuming trainees because we'd gotten bored of fighting.

At one point during hand-to-hand combat training, Annie dragged me away from my partner at the time, who happened to be Marco, and told me she wanted to test her skills against mine. Apparently, she had been wanting to since the beginning of training, but I was to dense to realize it, in her words. How the hell am I supposed to know what people want if the don't tell me?

Now, we're always partners, even if we aren't graded heavily on how well we fight with each other. We've become good friends, Annie and I. Every time, it seems, we manage to find a reason to slack and torment our fellow recruits. Great bonding activity, sneaking up on people to abuse them with one of your closest friends. Shows the level of coordination between two people. Haha. School yard bullying for the win. But at least we were only picking on kids bigger than us.

When Reiner caught sight of me, he moved to tell Bert, but Annie was already there, expertly throwing him to the ground. Bertholdt froze, and I made a beeline for him, and I jumped on his back and placed my hands over his eyes.

"Guess who?" I laughed, fairly sure he knew. But then we tumbled over, because the force of my jump couple with my weight knocked him off balance. I rolled off of him and continued laughing.

"I thought we were supposed to be teaching them to expect the unexpected, not roll around on the ground and laugh like a giddy school girl," Annie said disapprovingly. She did, however, glance at Bertholdt and grin. "Though I suppose getting attacked by his girlfriend isn't supposed to be humiliating.

Which is exactly how the situation turned for Bertholdt. He sat up, and his face was as red as a tomato. "I'm not his girlfriend," I snorted. "I just don't need to beat the shit outta him to teach him a lesson. Isn't that right, Bert?" I patted him on the head and began running my fingers through his soft, dark hair. He got even redder, if possible, and he jumped up and walked away hurriedly. I laughed again. "See?"

"All I see is an embarrassed boy running away," Annie snorted.

Reiner came walking up to us, looking tired. "Did you scare Bertholdt away, Annie?" he teased. She gave him a dirty look, which gave the clear message, 'Shut the fuck up before I snap you in half'.

"Nope, that was me," I said, still sitting on the ground. "I guess I made him upset by tackling him to the ground and then petting his hair like a kid."

"Upset is right," Reiner agreed. "But not for the reasons you think." He grinned at my perplexed look. "I'll be heading to the bath house house to find him. Because that's where he goes when he gets really emotional. Especially when it involves you. Shadis is about to call it quits for the day, anyway," he added, pointing to the man moving to the center of the foray of trainees.  "I think he's got it down to a science: whenever the two of you get bored and attack some unsuspecting victims, it's time to call it quits before somebody dies."

Annie made a fist, and Reiner backed away. "I didn't mean that offensively, Annie! See you later, Lia!" With that, he took off.

"It's funny to watch a grown man run away from small girls like us," I said with a smirk, finally standing up. "It's happened twice in one day. I consider today a victory."

"Let's get a head start as well," Annie said, weaving through the crowd. I hurried to catch up. "I hate getting caught in the rush."


Annie and I ended up being the first ones there, but I ended up being one of the last out. A couple of girls got into a fist fight over something or another, and I ended up being the only person who decided that they needed to break it up. Considering I got there in the climax of the battle, I ended getting a lot of blood over me and my clean clothes. That blood wasn't even mine. But I ended up having to rewash myself and then my clothes, to make sure they didn't stain. I asked Sasha and Mikasa to go to the barracks and get some clothes ready for me afterwards, but there was still the problem of me progressing from the bath house to the barracks. I put the clothes back on, because I sure as hell wasn't running out naked, and I didn't particularly feel like wearing my dirty clothes from training.

"Okay, it really sucks to run around wearing wet clothes," I announced as I walked into the barracks. "It's really cold and windy, and I got all sorts of funny looks because I was running like a manic to get here because I look like I won a wet t-shirt contest because I'm wearing a white shirt and a black bra-why are you guys going through my trunk?" I interrupted myself, rushing over. I said the duffle bag, not the trunk!"

Sasha held up a bright yellow skirt, part of the clothes I had been bent on keeping hidden her specifically. "This is so pretty!" Sasha gushed. "Not to mention expensive! And you've got so many skirts and shirts like this! How come you've got it all hidden away in here?"

"Because I didn't want anyone finding it," I said, slapping my forehead. "Especially YOU, because I knew this would happen. Why the hell are you going through my trunk?" I repeated, my voice rising. I stripped off my wet clothes and put on a new set of dry underwear and bra. "I know I've got some clean clothes in the bag."

"Yeah, but I saw some brightly colored fabric in here forever ago, and I wanted to know what it was," Sasha said brightly, pulling out every damn skirt I had hidden. "Today seemed like the perfect day to search!"

"You did give us permission, after all," Mikasa added. She held up a bright teal skirt, and the matching shirt slipped from her hands. "I like this one," she muttered.

"I can totally understand why," I sighed. "They reminded me of Eren's eyes, even when I first opened the packages on my birthday. You can wear it if you want. I'm sure as hell not going to."

"But why?" Sasha asked, her voice whiny. "If I had all these pretty clothes, I'd wear them all the time."

"Be my guest," I repeated, shrugging. "Dressy clothes aren't my thing. Especially after my brother told me why he got me these," I added in a low voice.

"So you're talking with your brother again?" Mikasa asked, her tone colored with the sound of vague interest.

"Yeah," I said. I hadn't told anyone I had met him on my birthday a year or so ago, and have kept in touch with him ever since.

"He must've spent a lot on these," Sasha commented, rubbing her face on the fabric. "Why did he buy all this for you, if he knows you don't like dresses?"

"Just because they don't suit me doesn't mean that I don't like them," I corrected her. "And you guys HAVE to swear you won't tell anyone, because it's really embarrassing." They both nodded quietly, waiting for me to go on. I sighed. "It's obvious that I'm not going into the military police. I don't have either the class standing nor the wish to join. However, he doesn't want me in the military. His been against my...enlistment since the very beginning. So he...he told me to find myself a nice boy heading into the military police, get pregnant or married, whichever happened to come first, and move into the inner wall with him," I finished, burying my head in my hands, feeling mortified for having just said it allowed.

"Are you kidding me?" Sasha asked, grinning. "You don't need nice clothes just for THAT. You've got how many boys already in love with you?"

"Shut up. I told you both this in confidence, so I shouldn't be hearing this from anyone else around anyone else."

"Let's see," Sasha said, looking thoughtful. "There's obviously Jean, he's going into the military police. There's Marco, too."

"Don't forget Bertholdt," Mikasa added quietly. "Eren told me he wanted to join the military police, too."

"You know what, screw you guys. I shouldn't have told either of you anything," I said, regretting my decision. I was also beginning to regret the decision to stand in the middle of the chilly barracks with almost no clothes on.

"Come on, Lia," Sasha said, grinning. "Wear something one time. Just tonight. That's all I'm asking. I want to see how all the boys'll react to seeing you dress like a girl for once."

I shook my head, wrapping my arms about myself. "I look funny in skirts. Why do you think I don't wear any of it? The clothes are pretty and everything, but..."

"One night," Mikasa stated. "Just one night, or we will tell everyone about what your big brother said," she added dangerously.

"You guys are such bullies," I relented irritably. "Want to pick the color while you're at it?" When a piece of teal fabric was thrown in my face, I took that as my answer.

"Hey, look at these," Sasha said suggestively, pulling out a pair of lace stockings. "I wonder what these are for?"

"No," I said, before she could even say anything. "I will NOT wear those."

Sasha gave me a look. "Do you want everyone to know what your brother said?"

"I'm kind of wondering if I should just tell everyone myself," I snapped, but I snatched the damn dark, lacy things out of her hands.



"Thanks for rushing us out, Sasha," I grumbled, teeth chattering, as we hurried into the mess hall. "I didn't have the time to even grab my jacket."

"Stop complaining. You look wonderful," she said, gesturing to my teal skirt and shirt set, topped off by a black vest with corset boning. As if I needed something extra to enhance my curves. "I'm sure some nice boy will offer you their jacket," she said with a wink.

"I'll kill you," I said, glaring at her balefully. Sasha grinned at me as she hurried away towards the line of people, which was fairly long by now.

Sighing, I shook my head. "Come on, Mikasa. I don't feel like standing in line forever. Let's wait."

She merely nodded, and we headed towards Eren and Armin, who were already at the table eating. My stomach growled at precisely that moment. "Screw you, life," I said aloud to nobody in particular. The both of them looked up at the sound of my voice, and Eren's mouth fell open, thankfully, it was empty, and Armin nearly choked.

"Holy crap," Eren said, staring at me with wide eyes.

"You-you're actually wearing a skirt," Armin finished, once he stopped coughing.

I put my hands on my hips. Maybe not such a good idea, because that movement inadvertently drew their eyes down my figure. "Come on, guys," I said, rolling my eyes. "Can't I want to look nice once in a while?" Want? No. Forced? Yes. I glared at Mikasa. "This is why I don't wear skirts," I hissed in a low voice. She ignored me and took a seat at the table. With a sigh, I sat beside her, and I shivered again. Damn Sasha and Mikasa for making me wear such thin clothes on a cold night like this without a jacket.

"You want my jacket?" Eren asked almost immediately, beginning to slip off his black cardigan.

"Don't worry about it, Eren," I said quickly, refusing to look at Mikasa's smug face. "I'll warm up once I get some hot food in me."

This is exactly why I didn't wear dresses. I attracted too much attention. In a way, I found that comforting, because I at least knew I wasn't ugly. But still. "I'm going to stand in line," I said, standing up. "Maybe I'll get warmer faster by standing next to people." For some reason, they all followed me, including Armin and Eren.

"Sure you don't want my jacket?" Eren repeated.

I shook my head. "I'll be fine," I said again. "But still, I wouldn't have to suffer at all if someone didn't rush me," I insinuated, staring at Mikasa pointedly.

Something warm was wrapped around my shoulders. Instinctively, I curled back and felt my back press against a hard, warm surface. Looking over my shoulder, I exclaimed, "Jean!" Grasping at my shoulders, I caught hold of the edges of a jacket.

"I didn't give that to you because I like you or anything," Jean said immediately. "I just wanted you to quit your bitching." he grinned at me. "I want it back at the end of supper, got it?" He turned away and walked back to his table, but not before I saw a glimpse of his slightly red cheeks.

Pulling the jacket tighter around me, I stared at the floor. Ever since Valentine's day and the, erm, incident, a couple of weeks ago, I couldn't help but feel different around him, even though we promised each other nothing was different, that we were friends. It would seem he was having the same issues.

"Not fair, Lia," Eren said, breaking me out of my reverie. I lifted m head. "You'll take HIS jacket but not mine. I see how it is."

"Shut up. You heard the man. Means absolutely nothing," I asserted. "If I didn't take it, he'd bitch about me bitching and wanting to shut me up and it'd never end. Sometimes you gotta pick the fights to engage in or let slide, Suicidal Bastard," I snorted at him.

Eren never tired of hearing someone calling him by his apt, affectionate nickname, given to him by the rest of us. "Yeah, right. I don't plan on dying. Though it's a different story for those titans." he frowned deeply, furrowing his brows together. "How come nobody calls you a suicidal bastard, Lia?"

"I wonder," I snorted, "I am a bastard child, after all. Maybe because I'm not in a serious hurry to fly into certain death like you are? I mean, I want to kill titans too, but you're so impulsive in comparison to me. You're much more likely to die than me, even with Mikasa and Armin on your side."

"Oh yeah? Who's the one ranked in the top ten, huh?" he fired back. "I'm doing the absolute best I can, unlike you. How can YOU survive if you don't try to get better?"

"Like I said," I responded, grinning slightly. "I pick and choose my battles. This isn't one I'm willing to have." It was finally my turn to get a tray of food. Mikasa and Armin had already left ahead of us, but Mikasa glanced back, making it evident she was listening in.

Yeah, so I wasn't slacking off. Not really. I've stuck to my midnight training regimen, and it's paid off. Nobody else was even close to what I could do involving the 3DMG. Sometimes I did other workouts too, just to shake it up a little. So, I didn't have to fight with Eren. I knew I wasn't a slacker, and that was enough for me. It wasn't like I needed everyone to know I was better than most like Eren.

I sat down and ate slowly, fairly quiet throughout the rest of dinner. Graduation was coming up in little more than a year. Only one more year left, and I'd be splitting up from a lot of my friends. Eren, Armin, Mikasa, and me would still be together, but Sasha, Connie, Jean, Annie, Marco, probably Reiner, and Bert would all be headed to the military police. I felt a sinking feeling in my stomach; I'd miss them a lot. But some people weighed more heavily in my mind than others did. I guessed I'd just have to make the most of it while we were still together.

"Oi, Lia. You look upset." I jumped and looked up to see Eren's face centimeters away from mine. I hadn't realized he had moved from across the table.

"Goddammit Eren, quit scaring me like that," I sighed.

"Yeah, Jaeger, quit being an ass," Jean said from across the aisle between our tables.

"Nobody asked you, horse face," Eren responded with a scowl. "Maybe you should take care of her, then I wouldn't have to."

"You make it sound like I'm a chore," I snorted. "Besides, Jean gave me his jacket for dinner. He is taking care of me, in a way."

"There you go, Jaeger," Jean called, grinning. "Now sit the fuck down and calm yourself."

"Hey, horse face, he was trying to be nice. You shut up, too," I said, smiling slightly. Jean stuck his tongue out at me, but he grinned back at me, and returned to talking to Marco.

"Since when did the two of you progress to actual friendship?" Armin asked astutely, noticing the slight difference in the way Jean and I have been treating one another.

"When we realized picking on everyone else together was just as fun as abusing one another," I laughed, dodging the question.The bell rang, signalling the end of dinner. "Awesome," I said, yawning. "I was starting to feel really tired." I took jean's jacket off and threw it at him, watching it land on his head.

"I was joking, Lia," he said, pulling it off his head. "You can wear it back to the barracks and give it back to me tomorrow." He held it out to me again.

I flushed red. "Quit being weird. I'll be fine. I'll make Mikasa and Sasha keep me warm, since it's their fault I'm jacket-less in the first place." I hurriedly stood up and dragged Mikasa with me. I was half surprised that she let me.

"Night Eren, night Armin," I said, and I bumped into someone in front of me. Green eyes stared at me from above. "Sorry, Bert," I said, half-smiling, remembering our encounter from earlier. "For earlier and now, actually!"

He looked at me, his face blushing. "Y-you don't have to worry about it. I should be used to you by now."

"Is that a compliment or an insult?" Looking around, I realized Reiner was nowhere to be found. Weird.

"A compliment!" he said quickly. "Speaking of which, you look pretty!" With that, he sped out of the room, leaving me dumbfounded, while still holding Mikasa's hand. It was her turn to drag me, and we left the mess hall. I heard a faint sound echoing from her scarf; was she laughing?

"Your brother is a very smart man," she said, obviously entertained.